So Judy Lynn used to love love love butterflies. Honey Bunny used to give her a hard time when she would admire them and ladybugs, and would tell her, "that's a bug." She HATED bugs and was NOT happy with daddy when he would call her precious ladybug or butterfly a bug. She would quickly tell him, "that's not a BUG daddy." We would laugh and play back and forth with her. After she passed away, it was very important to us to make sure they put a butterfly on her headstone, along with a cross, a dove, and a flower design. The butterfly story had just begun as we would come to find out. On the day of the funeral, we were in a completely different place. I am only able to remember bits and pieces of the funeral, and for parts of it, I almost feel like I was on auto pilot. It was a hot and sunny day and we sat under a tarp they had placed to shade us. Our friends and family had turned out to the cemetery in huge numbers and even released pink balloons into the air at the end, which we had no idea they were planning on doing. A couple of months after the funeral, I started to hear "butterfly stories."
My good friend the "red-headed sister" said the day of the funeral, there was a huge yellow butterfly with black on it that sat on the top of the tarp we were sitting under during the entire service. She said at the end, the butterfly flew off as it had finished its participation in the event. When she arrived to her car to leave, she was feeling terrible and very sad. The huge yellow butterfly was sitting on the top of her SUV upon her arrival, and flew off happily after she left.
The yellow butterfly returned months later when she was getting ready for her daughter's first birthday party. She had told me she tried desperately to take pictures of it before it flew off, but was unable to capture a picture. Her home is miles and miles away from the cemetery.
When we had decided that we were going to convert Judy's room, into Spiderman's room, we pondered what we would do with all her stuff. Many of her items would be given to friends and family members, and we planned to keep a bunch of things. Her princess toddler set was far too big and bulky to keep, and we no longer had room or use for it. The idea to give it to red-headed's daughter seemed like a perfect idea. Red-headed was thrilled that "big eyes" would be the receipient of Judy's princess furniture. She came by one afternoon with big eyes, and we cried, we laughed, and we loaded everything into her SUV. She drove home and big eyes was asleep. She decided to leave her in the car and unload the furniture. She had brought the toddler bed to her front door and set it outside. She went inside bringing in the bench and toy box. When she went back outside, a HUGE yellow butterfly, just like the one she had seen before was sitting on top of the toddler bed. She stood there and smiled and cried thinking of Judy.
My cousin, "sweetest nail lady" has two precious girls, one only a year apart from Judy, and a few months after Judy had died, the girls were in the backyard playing and thinking, and talking about Judy. Sweetest nail lady had told me that they saw the most beautiful HUGE yellow butterfly outside flying around with the girls. Little "curly" even commented that the butterfly made her think of Judy.
One day Wonderboy and I went out to the cemetery to replace her flowers. I was pregnant at the time and it has always been so hard to go out to the cemetery. Wonderboy said, "look mom!" A HUGE yellow butterfly was flying around me as I was kneeling down changing the flowers. Wonderboy went on to tell me that it had landed on my leg first.
The day that we went to Ruidoso to get away, we saw a HUGE yellow butterfly flying around the site on the one year anniversary of her death. I could go on and on telling the stories of butterfly encounters, and perhaps I will tell more stories in future blogs.
We decided to plant a butterfly garden this year. Planting the garden has been bitter sweet. On one hand, it has been fun finding flowers to plant and working together as a family to prepare the space. On the other hand, it has made us so sad that Judy Lynn has not been here to enjoy the garden and the flowers with us. She absolutely loved being outside, and flowers would have been the icing on the cake. We have been hoping that our garden will attract thousands of butterflies this spring and summer, and that we will be able to look outside and enjoy them for months.
So today, honey bunny went outside to water and check the progress of the seeds and bulbs. He came in so excited talking about, guess what,...........a HUGE yellow butterfly that showed up this morning flying around. He said that it almost looked like it was going to land on his leg. Of course he did not have his camera or phone to capture a picture. I immediately looked outside to try to catch a glimpse of the butterfly he had described, but it was gone. I know we will see it again soon.
I feel like God gives us little things to help make us feel like our loved ones are around and ok
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